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What if the Most Effective Way to Build Trust Was to Tell the Truth Your Clients Have Been Avoiding?

Most models postpone confrontation until rapport is built. RLT shows you how to build rapport through it, by speaking hard truths with enough empathy and skill that keeps your clients leaning in.
Enroll Now

Continuing Ed credits for this course are available only when offered LIVE ONLY.

New dates coming SOON! 

For the therapist or coach ready to use a trusted, precise method that brings clarity to even the most complex couples dynamic.

Every effective intervention starts with one thing:

A deep understanding of what’s really going on.

Get that right, and you’ve got a roadmap. A way to lead the session with purpose, direction, and a real chance at repair. Miss it, and you risk circling surface issues, managing reactivity, and never quite touching the core – session after session..

That kind of clarity is rarely handed to you.

In sessions filled with blame, shutdown, or dead silence, finding the truth beneath the layers of pain and resentment is anything but straightforward.

But what if, even in your toughest sessions, you could…

Cut through the noise. Diagnose the pattern. And intervene with precision.

It’s exactly what Terry Real has been doing for over 30 years, stepping into highly reactive rooms and naming what’s really going on beneath the surface.

Not by waiting for insight to emerge. But by using a clear, structured method that shows you what to look for, what to say, and how to lead the work forward.

That method is built on 8 powerful diagnostic lenses. Each one revealing a different piece of the couple’s story.

Enroll Now

The 8 Diagnostic Lenses of Relational Life Therapy

At the heart of RLT Level 1 is a structured approach to what we call waking up the client – helping them recognize the real role they play in their relational dynamic. To do that effectively, you’ll learn to assess each couple through 8 specific diagnostic lenses that bring clarity to even the most complex relationships.

Lens 1

Presenting Problem(s)

Clarify each partner’s core complaint. RLT always treats two individuals, never just
a relationship, so every case begins with identifying two distinct narratives.

Lens 2

Preconditions

Screen for issues that must be addressed before relational work can begin. This includes factors like active addiction, psychiatric instability, or ongoing abuse.

Lens 3

Stance, Stance-Dance

Identify each partner’s relational stance and the repetitive loop they co-create. This lens reveals the dynamic that keeps them stuck.

Lens 4

Losing Strategies

Spot the five automatic behaviors that derail intimacy. These include being right, controlling, unbridled self-expression, retaliation, and withdrawal.

Lens 5

Relational Grid

Map each partner’s relational posture by assessing their self-esteem and boundaries – particularly how grandiosity or shame shows up in the dynamic.

Lens 6

Family Role

Explore which childhood survival role each partner adopted, such as the hero, scapegoat, or lost child, and how that role influences their adult relationships.

Lens 7

Latent/Blatant Typology

Assess how power is expressed in the relationship. Latent partners tend to be indirect or passive, while blatant partners are more overt, dominant, or grandiose.

Lens 8

Social Context

Account for broader cultural factors like gender, race, class, & privilege. This lens helps you recognize how social identity shapes power, expectation, & behavior in the relationship.

Enroll Now
Introduction

Relational Life Therapy Level 1

A clear, structured approach to the most complex work you’ll ever do.

RLT Level 1 is a five-module online training that brings you into the room with Terry Real as he teaches the 8 diagnostic lenses behind Relational Life Therapy. You’ll explore how to assess couples through reactive patterns, family roles, power dynamics, shame, and social context – and learn how to use this framework in your own practice.

Training includes recorded teaching, real demonstrations, and guided integration to help you build fluency and apply the method confidently in practice.

Whether you’re looking to go deeper in your couples work, or want a diagnostic map you can rely on when sessions go off track, RLT Level 1 offers a clear, practical foundation to guide your approach.

By the end of this program, you’ll be able to:

Lead with clarity

Know exactly what to track & how to intervene.

Stay grounded

Hold complexity without absorbing the chaos.

Diagnose with precision

See what’s really driving the dysfunction.

Work with reactivity

Address power, shame, disconnection head-on.

Guide the process

Interrupt patterns and move couples forward.

Speak hard truths

Confront skillfully while staying connected.

Level up your practice

Shift how you see and work with couples.

The Curriculum

Module 1: The Three Phases of RLT and How They Work

Before you can change what’s happening between two partners, you need to know what you’re looking at. This opening module reframes the entire approach to couples therapy by introducing the three foundational phases of RLT and how they work together to generate transformation. 

You’ll also learn why conventional neutrality can backfire, and what it means to diagnose relational dynamics rather than individual pathology.

Highlights include:

  • How to identify the true starting point for change in any couples session
  • Why traditional neutrality often leads to therapeutic paralysis, and what to do instead
  • The three phases of the RLT method, and how they create a clear arc for relational repair
  • How to view the couple as a living system, rather than two parallel individuals
  • The difference between individual diagnosis and relational diagnosis, and why it matters
  • Why RLT leads with truth-telling, and how that creates the conditions for deep emotional healing

Module 2: Building a Clearer Diagnostic Picture from the Start

Once you understand the RLT model, the next step is learning how to apply it in real time. Module 2 introduces the first three lenses of relational diagnosis and shows you how to gather targeted, in-the-moment data that reveals each partner’s stance and the deeper patterns beneath the conflict.

Highlights include:

  • How to surface two distinct presenting problems and why this matters for every session that follows
  • The three preconditions that must be ruled out before intimacy work can begin
  • How to spot each partner’s stance and decode the feedback loop they co-create
  • Why just listening won’t cut it and what it means to gather data like a relational clinician
  • Learn how to assess a couple’s dynamic from what’s said, what plays out in the room, and what it stirs in you as the therapist or coach
  • Why staying in the present moment yields more useful data than digging endlessly into the past

Module 3: Spotting the Patterns That Keep Clients Stuck

Go deeper into the heart of the couple’s dysfunction by decoding their reactive strategies and early conditioning. This module introduces the concept of the Adaptive Child and the five Losing Strategies, giving you a structured way to name each partner’s reactivity without shame or blame.

Highlights include:

  • How to help clients shift from defensive patterns to a more open, relational stance
  • Why insight alone won’t lead to change without first confronting what’s in the way
  • The five Losing Strategies that keep couples stuck in cycles of conflict and disconnection
  • How to identify and name Adaptive Child responses in the moment
  • A language for describing reactivity that clients can actually hear and work with
  • Why the goal isn’t neutrality, but compassionate confrontation that leads to movement

Module 4: Uncovering the Deeper Structures Driving Disconnection

Zoom out to consider the larger forces shaping the couple’s dynamic. This module takes you deeper into the structural forces shaping their behavior. You’ll learn how to use the Relational Grid to assess self-esteem and boundaries, and how early family roles continue to shape how each partner shows up in their relationships.

Highlights include:

  • How to spot the intersection of self-esteem and boundaries using the four quadrants of the Relational Grid
  • The signs your client is stuck in grandiosity, shame, enmeshment, or withdrawal
  • How to shift your approach based on where your client sits in the grid – and how to make that call in real time
  • How childhood roles like the “hero,” “lost child,” or “scapegoat” silently carry into adult relationships
  • What to look for when a client’s worth hinges on being needed, and how to help them let go
  • How to bring family-of-origin insights into the room without turning the session into individual therapy

Module 5: Power, Culture, and the Leverage to Create Change

In this final module, Terry introduces the last two diagnostic lenses – Blatant/Latent Power and Social Context – giving you the complete RLT assessment framework.

From there, you’ll learn how to use this full map to build leverage, confront stuck patterns with clarity, and motivate even resistant clients to move towards change.

Highlights include:

  • How to spot latent power in the room, and why the quieter partner often holds more influence than it seems
  • A structured way to work with power imbalances without collapsing into blame or rescue
  • How social identity shapes relational dynamics, and why it must be part of any accurate diagnosis
  • A look at Terry’s newest addition to the model, the Social Context lens, and how it sharpens your clinical approach
  • How to name what’s really at stake for clients in a way that motivates rather than shames
  • Why leverage is essential to change, and how to build it from the truth of what you see

Continuing Ed credits for this course are available only when offered LIVE ONLY.

New dates coming SOON! 

Enroll Now

Plus 5 special bonuses…

Bonus 1

75-Minute RLT Couples Therapy Demonstration with Terry Real

The fastest way to internalize the 8 diagnostic lenses is to see them in action.

Observe Terry conduct a real Phase 1 intervention with a couple, showing how he gathers data, reads the system, and begins to name the dynamic. This demonstration bridges the gap between theory and practice so you can better translate the model into your own sessions.

Bonus 2

3 Video Demonstrations:
RLT Role-Plays with Faculty

In these demonstration clips, experienced RLT faculty role-play common couples dynamics and show how a practitioner can navigate them using Phase 1 data-gathering tools.

You’ll see the subtle moves, from tracking interaction patterns to asking the right questions, that help reveal the deeper structure beneath the surface conflict.

Bonus 3

Trauma, Truth and Healing:
A Conversation with Gabor Maté

In this 60-minute interview, Terry sits down with Dr. Gabor Maté for an intimate dialogue on the relationship between trauma, emotional repression, and relational repair.

Together they explore the physical and relational toll of unresolved trauma and how both therapists and clients can begin to heal.

Bonus 4

On the Roots of RLT:
A Conversation with Carol Gilligan

Go behind the scenes of RLT’s origin story in this rare discussion between Terry and world-renowned feminist psychologist Carol Gilligan.

From the influence of relational ethics to the evolving role of gender in therapy, this conversation offers deeper insight into the intellectual foundations that shaped RLT and why it remains a timely, radical approach to working with couples.

Bonus 5

The RLT Q&A Vault:
Real Questions. Clear Answers.

Ever wish you could sit in on office hours w/ senior RLT faculty? This curated collection features some of the most insightful questions from past RLT Level 1 cohorts covering everything from trauma boundaries to building leverage, managing stuck sessions, and adapting RLT to different contexts.

2104

practitioners trained in RLT Level 1

18+ hours

of clinical training and bonus content

25+

countries represented by past students

Your RLT trainers

Terry Real, LICSW

A clear, structured approach to the most complex work you’ll ever do.

For over three decades, Terry Real has sat across from couples on the brink – yelling, shutting down, ready to walk away. And session after session, he’s helped them come back.

Not by sitting back and listening. But by leaning in with radical honesty, fierce compassion, and the clarity to name exactly what’s happening in the room. That’s what Terry is known for. He’s the therapist other therapists turn to when nothing else is working, the one who can untangle even the most entrenched dynamics and help people change for good.

To make his method teachable, Terry distilled everything he knows into a clear model called Relational Life Therapy (RLT), now taught to thousands of clinicians and coaches through the Relational Life Institute. Terry is also the author of four books, including I Don’t Want to Talk About It, the first book ever published on male depression, and the New York Times bestseller Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship.

Through RLT Level 1, you’ll gain the same diagnostic foundation Terry has used in real rooms with real couples so you can stop circling the surface and start changing lives.

Featured on

Kate Harris, PhD

Licensed Clinical Psychologist
(NH, ME, PSYPACT) | Faculty, Relational Life Institute

For more than two decades, Kate Harris has guided couples and individuals toward deeper connection and clarity. She discovered Relational Life Therapy in 2015, and after attending an RLT bootcamp with her husband in 2017, witnessed firsthand how the method deepened their 32-year marriage. That experience led her to seek certification, and in 2018 she became a founding faculty member at the Relational Life Institute.

Kate brings together RLT with Internal Family Systems, mindfulness, values-based coaching, and spiritual inquiry.

In this training, you’ll also learn from her through a series of live-recorded deep dives where she helps therapists translate the eight diagnostic lenses into powerful, real-world clinical tools. Her grounded, compassionate teaching supports clinicians in bridging theory and practice, making each session both effective and relationally present.

What Therapists Say About Learning from Terry Real

“Terry’s clear explanations, his no-BS style, and the structure of RLT gave me exactly what I needed to shift hurting couples quickly into more secure and satisfying relationships.”
— G.S.
“Before learning Terry Real’s model I was mostly working on the content level. Now I have guidelines to help clients perform the modest miracle of personal transformation on a process level—no matter what the content. It’s tremendous.”
—  R.D., Massachusetts
“The truth of the matter is, the words don’t exist that fully describe how it was working with Terry. He is one of the Greats who has revolutionized couples therapy.”
—  Karen Cunningham

Try Now. Decide Later.

Our unconditional 14-day guarantee

We’re confident that once you complete RLT Level 1, you’ll walk into couples sessions with more clarity, structure, and clinical confidence than ever before.

But if you go through the training and feel it hasn’t meaningfully improved the way you see and assess couples, simply email us within 14 days of your purchase, and we’ll refund you in full. No questions asked.

This is your risk-free way to experience the efficacy of the RLT method, and decide for yourself if it belongs in your practice.

When you join RLT Level 1, you’ll get:

  • 5 core training modules taught by Terry Real through pre-recorded video
  • Recorded deep-dive sessions with faculty member Kate Harris, PhD
  • 75-minute full-length RLT couples therapy session with Terry Real
  • 3 video demonstrations of role-plays led by RLT faculty
  • 60-minute interview with Dr. Gabor Maté and Terry Real on trauma and relational healing
  • 60-minute conversation with Dr. Carol Gilligan and Terry Real on the origins of RLT
  • Curated Q&A Vault from past student cohorts
  • Lifetime access to all training materials in your private student portal

Pay in Full

$395

3 x Monthly Payments

$137 × 3

What Therapists Say About Learning from Terry Real

“For me, 'joining in the truth' is a piece of the jigsaw that has been missing in therapeutic training... The framework of the RLT model fits exceptionally well with both the brain's 'self'-protection via the reticular activating system and the plasticity of the prefrontal cortex.”
—  Judith Balcazar
“The directness with which Terry speaks with his client I found confidence boosting - he's able to speak with truth and high regard and compassion and seeing the results was encouraging - particularly with clients most of us might withdraw a bit from.”
—  Linda Robertson
“Terry’s clear explanations, his no-BS style, and the structure of RLT gave me exactly what I needed to shift hurting couples quickly into more secure and satisfying relationships.”
— G.S.

Frequently Asked Questions

I’m not a therapist. Can I still apply this as a coach?

Yes. RLT Level 1 is designed for both therapists and coaches. In fact, many coaches already use RLT’s principles to deepen their client work. If you support people in relational growth, then this training will serve you well.

Absolutely. While RLT is rooted in couples work, the diagnostic tools and confrontational techniques are just as powerful in individual therapy, especially with clients working through relational trauma, boundary issues, or recurring patterns in relationships. You’ll walk away with new language, sharper insights, and strategies you can use immediately – even one-on-one.

Yes. Terry built RLT as a direct response to the limitations of traditional couples therapy. He’s often known as the “last resort” therapist, called in when nothing else has worked. This method was designed for the toughest cases: high-conflict couples, chronic resentment, emotional shutdown, infidelity, even situations on the brink of divorce.

We offer a risk-free window so you can experience the first module and decide if the training is right for you.

If after completing Module 1, including the live Q&A with Dr. Kate Harris, you don’t feel the program delivers the clarity or value you expected, simply email us within 48 hours of the module’s release and we’ll refund you in full. No hassle. No hard feelings.

You don’t have to, but we recommend it. The best way to build fluency with the RLT model is to start experimenting with the tools in session. Even applying one lens at a time can create powerful shifts. You’ll be surprised how quickly it clicks.

RLT stands apart in both philosophy and practice. It goes beyond managing conflict or building communication skills. It’s about calling out the core relational dynamics that keep couples stuck, and intervening with bold, compassionate truth-telling.

Where many methods stay neutral, RLT teaches you to lead. Where others rely on emotional safety first, RLT often works in real-time, even in the heat of the moment.

We hold deep respect for other modalities, and many of our students integrate RLT seamlessly with their existing training.

RLT Level 1 is trauma-informed but it does not teach the actual trauma work. That’s covered in Level 2.

Why? Because RLT takes trauma seriously. Before teaching you how to guide clients through deep healing, Level 1 ensures you know how to “wake them up” so you can interrupt dysfunctional patterns, expose adaptive child strategies, and get them ready for deeper work.

Without this foundation, trauma work in couples therapy can be ineffective, or worse, harmful. That’s why we build it in phases.

Not at first, and that’s okay. Terry may be able to identify root issues in a single session, but he invented the method and has 40+ years of experience.

As a new practitioner, you’re encouraged to take your time. RLT teaches you how to layer 8 diagnostic lenses over time, building a rich, nuanced picture of what’s really going on beneath the surface. With practice, precision comes.

Level 1 is a complete and self-contained training. Many graduates have made immediate improvements in their client outcomes after completing just this course.

That said, RLT is a deep and evolving model, and if you choose to go further, Level 2 and full certification are always available to you. 



When you join RLT Level 1, you’ll get:

  • 5 core training modules taught by Terry Real through pre-recorded video
  • Recorded deep-dive sessions with faculty member Kate Harris, PhD
  • 75-minute full-length RLT couples therapy session with Terry Real
  • 3 video demonstrations of role-plays led by RLT faculty
  • 60-minute interview with Dr. Gabor Maté and Terry Real on trauma and relational healing
  • 60-minute conversation with Dr. Carol Gilligan and Terry Real on the origins of RLT
  • Curated Q&A Vault from past student cohorts
  • Lifetime access to all training materials in your private student portal

Pay in Full

$395

3 x Monthly Payments

$137 × 3

Considering RLT Certification?
RLT Level 1 is the first step of the full certification pathway. If you choose to continue later, your full Level 1 tuition will be credited toward the certification.

Learn More

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The Relational Life

Working With Grandiosity

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

9.5 NBCC CE credit hours for Beginner Mental Health Professionals ($40 additional fee).
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for beginner level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

Over 5 LIVE 90-minute classes with Terry Real, you will learn how to effectively address issues of grandiosity in your clients. You’ll discover a range of strategies and techniques to confront grandiose clients with the impact of their behaviors, build an alliance, motivate them to change, and guide them into connection—with themselves and those around them.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  • Identify what’s deficient in grandiose clients and understand how you supply it as the therapist.
  • Identify strategies to confidently handle resistance, evasion, and verbal abuse.
  • Understand how to reconnect grandiose clients to themselves and those around them.

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

Understand the origins of grandiosity and why it isn’t always a defense against shame.

Identify techniques to find leverage to motivate grandiose clients to engage in the therapy.

Explain why taking sides is critical when working with grandiosity—and understand how to do it.

Registration URL

relationallife.com/working-with-grandiosity/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 9.5 NBCC credit hours ($40 fee)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
  • Participants must have paid for this course, completed a course Evaluation, and passed the test (80% or higher grade) showing the material has been learned in order to receive a certificate
  • No partial credit is available
  • Failure to complete and submit these materials will result in forfeiture of CE credit for the entire course. No exceptions can be made.
If you have questions please contact support@terryreal.com for guidance.
It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these CE credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$495

3 Payments

3 x $175

$525 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 2 days after purchase. Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase.

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

Level 2 Homestudy

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

10 NBCC CE hours for Intermediate Mental Health Professionals ($40 fee)
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

ICF (International Coaching Federation)

10 ICF CCE hours (2 Core Competency + 8 Resource Development)
ICF CCE
International Coaching Federation (ICF) has approved this program for 2 Core Competency hours and 8 Resource Development hours. (Resource Development includes training formerly called Personal Development, Business Development, or Other Skills and Tools.)

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for Intermediate level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

Building on the foundational diagnostic lenses introduced in RLT Level 1, this course invites clinicians into the transformative next phase of Relational Life Therapy: deep trauma work. Therapists expand their capacity to understand each partner’s relational stance—how it was formed, how it functions defensively, and how it can be reshaped in the service of intimacy. Participants learn to conduct powerful inner child work in the presence of the partner, work effectively with resistance and leverage, and integrate attachment styles with trauma and relational stances—leaving with practical, structured tools for facilitating trauma repair within couples therapy.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  • Explain when to use positive and negative leverage
  • Describe joining through, as opposed to clobbering someone with, the truth
  • Describe using the family of origin work to rebalance the relationship
  • Explain moving from the present into the past by using the “affect bridge” (when have you felt these feelings before?)
  • Explain Transitioning to Family of Origin by using the 3 questions: (Whom did you see do this? Who did it to you? And who did you do it to and no one stopped you?)
  • Explain how to frame current difficulties as the opportunity to transform one’s legacy and hand over a different future to one’s children
  • List 4 types of trauma and where they fall on the Trauma Grid
  • Describe how the Adaptive Child is formed
  • Discuss re-parenting the Adaptive and Wounded Child parts
  • List the five fears behind resistance and how to respond to them
  • Describe understanding and befriending the resistant part
  • Describe using positive and negative leverage with a resistant part
  • Explain how to sell the value of intimacy along with its skills to a Type 1 Love Avoidant
  • Explain how to teach negotiation and the assertion of needs along with appropriate trauma work when dealing with a Type 2 Love Avoidant
  • Explain how to work on self-esteem, boundaries, and the remembrance of abundance when working with Love Dependents

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

Deepen understanding of each partner’s relational stance and its developmental origins

Identify and address multi-generational legacies influencing current couple dynamics

Conduct structured inner child work in the presence of the partner to foster empathy and intimacy

Facilitate trauma repair within the relational system rather than in isolation

Recognize and effectively work with client resistance using leverage principles

Practice detachment from outcome while maintaining clear therapeutic leadership

Apply attachment theory within RLT to guide interventions and strengthen relational connection

Registration URL

relationallife.com/level-2-training/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 10 NBCC or ICF credit hours ($40 fee)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
  • Participants must have paid for this course and attended all five LIVE online sessions in full in order to receive a Continuing Education certificate.
  • No partial credit is available — partial attendance does not qualify for partial CE hours.
  • At the end of the final session you’ll receive an email inviting you to request your certificate. The certificate is free of charge.
  • Failure to attend all sessions will result in forfeiture of CE credit for the entire course. No exceptions can be made.
If you have questions please contact support@terryreal.com for guidance.
It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, or organization is approved for these CE credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$397

3 Payments

3 x $137

$411 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 2 days after purchase. Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase.

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

Level 1 – Homestudy

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

10 NBCC CE hours for Beginner Mental Health Professionals ($40 fee)
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

ICF (International Coaching Federation)

10 ICF CCE hours (7 Core Competency + 3 Resource Development)
ICF CCE
International Coaching Federation (ICF) has approved this program for 7 Core Competency hours and 3 Resource Development hours. (Resource Development includes training formerly called Personal Development, Business Development, or Other Skills and Tools.)

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for beginner level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

Terry Real presents RLI’s introductory training course, Relational Life Therapy Level 1. Over five recorded classes you’ll be introduced to the powerful principles behind Relational Life Therapy (RLT) as taught by Terry Real, designed to give you an in-depth introduction to the theory and practice of the RLT model. Students will discover the differences between RLT and traditional psychodynamic therapy, and explore the stances of “one-down shame” and “one-up grandiosity” in couples. RLT is about action and lasting results, and the concepts of Relational Mindfulness, Joining Through The Truth, and psychological patriarchy are presented. RLT Level 1 is the first step toward RLT certification and prepares you for the Level 2 & 3 trainings.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  • Compare the RLT phases and how RLT differs from traditional therapy.
  • Describe the role and approach of the practitioner in RLT.
  • Diagnose the RLT view of power imbalances in couples, of psychological patriarchy, and how these are addressed through therapy.
  • Summarize Relational Mindfulness and the “fight, flight, fix” responses.
  • Describe the role and approach of the therapist in RLT.
  • Explain the two types of leverage.
  • Discuss the concept of appropriate discrepancy and how it works with neuroplasticity.
  • List the 8 diagnostic lenses in RLT.
  • Interpret how preconditions are addressed in RLT.
  • Compare the two types of boundaries.
  • Demonstrate strategies for empowering latent clients.

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

Illustrate that true intimacy can only happen when partners are “same-as” – neither one-up nor one-down.

Discuss how RLT practitioners will confront and teach their clients how to live relationally.

Hypothesize how RLT practitioners use judicious self-disclosure, sharing stories of how they use these same skills in their own relationships.

Registration URL

relationallife.com/level-1-homestudy/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 10 NBCC or ICF credit hours ($40 fee)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
  • Participants must have paid for this course, completed a course Evaluation, and passed the test (80% or higher grade)
  • No partial credit is available
  • Failure to complete materials results in forfeiture of CE credit for the entire course. No exceptions.
Instructions are included in your RLT Course Library for Homestudy Level 1 at https://learn.relationallife.com/
If you have questions please contact support@terryreal.com for guidance.
It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these CE credit hours. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$397

3 Payments

3 x $137

$411 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 2 days after purchase. Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase.

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

Level 3 Homestudy

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

11 NBCC CE hours for Advanced Mental Health Professionals ($40 fee)
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

ICF (International Coaching Federation)

11 ICF CCE hours (7 Core Competency + 4 Resource Development)
ICF CCE
International Coaching Federation (ICF) has approved this program for 7 Core Competency hours and 4 Resource Development hours. (Resource Development includes training formerly called Personal Development, Business Development, or Other Skills and Tools.)

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for advanced level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

This is an advanced training for RLT clinicians who have completed our Level 1 and Level 2 trainings. Terry guides participants through a combination of lecture, video presentation, discussion, role plays, and a previously recorded LIVE demonstration of RLT couples therapy, grounding theory in practice. You will observe and then practice the more advanced techniques of RLT—drilling down into how to empower the latent and reconnect the blatant—focusing on the art of therapeutic coaching and mentoring clients into relationality.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  • Practice ways to increase skill in working with family of origin issues.
  • Construct empowering reframes.
  • Demonstrate blocking and repositioning.
  • Analyze and articulate the couple’s choreography, their dynamic (e.g. the more she pursues, the more he withdraws).
  • Integrate Attachment Theory into RLT.
  • Identify and work on your “edges” as an RLT therapist.
  • Interpret the tri-part system of the psyche: wise adult, adaptive child, wounded child.
  • Measure the neurobiological underpinnings of trauma adaptation and recovery.
  • Utilize their clients’ relationships as crucibles for their own transformation.
  • Explain to your clients how to use the relational map and tool kit, a relational technology, that has the power to deliver on our new romantic ambitions.

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

Joining through the truth

What is relationality, what is self esteem?

What is real intimacy?

Triggering, types of leverage, relational reckoning

Taking a fixed position

Identifying reacting and modeling behaviors

Using skill transference, relational jujitsu

Constructing empowering reframes

RLT Stances, amplifying progress and dealing with resistance

Blocking and repositioning

Registration URL

relationallife.com/level-3-training/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 11 NBCC or ICF credit hours ($40 fee)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
  • Participants must have paid for this course and attended all five LIVE online sessions in full in order to receive a Continuing Education certificate.
  • No partial credit is available — partial attendance does not qualify for partial CE hours.
  • At the end of the final session you’ll receive an email inviting you to request your certificate. The certificate is free of charge.
  • Failure to attend all sessions will result in forfeiture of CE credit for the entire course. No exceptions can be made.
If you have questions please contact support@terryreal.com for guidance.
It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, or organization is approved for these CE credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$397

3 Payments

3 x $187

$561 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 2 days after purchase. Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase.

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

Working With Infidelity

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

7 NBCC CE hours for Intermediate Mental Health Professionals ($40 fee)
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for Intermediate level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

A 5-module previously recorded training on how to work with couples to help them come back from infidelity. This offers the unique RLT perspective on working with infidelity, where not only do we help couples survive an affair, but we focus on using the crisis as an opportunity for deeper change in the relationship.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  1. Summarize the goals of treatment: using the crisis as a springboard for transformational change in the character of each partner and the essential character of the union itself
  2. Compare the 2 phases of treatment: containment and transformation
  3. Demonstrate how to deal with countertransference: managing your own feelings around infidelity
  4. Create a platform for the hurt partner to deal with the trauma of betrayal and deceit
  5. List what ultimately helps hurt partners regain trust
  6. Identify the dysfunctional relational stances that contributed to the infidelity and how to address them
  7. Explain the 3 reasons behind an involved partner’s lack of “no”
  8. Outline how each partner can implement the relational skills for a stronger and healthier relationship
  9. Discuss moving beyond the victim/perpetrator framework into one that builds hope

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

An Overview of the RLT Approach to Infidelity

The Hurt Partner: Infidelity as a Trauma

The Involved Partner: Understanding the Lack of “No”

Infidelity as an Opportunity for Transformation

Infidelity in the Modern Age: Biases, Assumptions, and Models of Fidelity

Registration URL

relationallife.com/infidelity/#link

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 7 NBCC credit hours ($40 fee)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
  • Participants must have paid for this course, completed a course Evaluation, and passed the test (80% or higher grade)
  • No partial credit is available
  • Failure to complete materials results in forfeiture of CE credit for the entire course. No exceptions.
Instructions are included in your RLT Course Library for this course at https://learn.relationallife.com/
If you have questions please contact support@terryreal.com for guidance.
It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these CE credit hours. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$497

3 Payments

3 x $179

$537 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 2 days after purchase. Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase.

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

Getting to a Second Session

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

2 NBCC CE hours — free upon successful completion of a short online assessment
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for Intermediate level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

This self-paced training introduces therapists and coaches to one of the eight core diagnostic lenses used in Relational Life Therapy (RLT): The More, The More. Participants learn how to quickly identify the repeating relational pattern in a couple’s first session — and give them a compelling reason to return for a second.

Registration URL

relationallife.com/second-session/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 2 NBCC credit hours (free with completion)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
Participants must complete a course Evaluation and pass a short online assessment (80% or higher). The 2 NBCC CE credit hours are then available free upon completion. No partial credit is available.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 48 hours after the first live class. (Deadline for refunds: May 21, 2026.)

Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase. 

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering a professional training program for clinicians, and has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

RLT Level 1 Training

LIVE Workshop Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Bonny Slim, LMFT & Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

10 NBCC CE hours for Beginner Mental Health Professionals — free certificate
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for Beginner level clinicians.

Format:

Five LIVE Online Sessions on Zoom — facilitated by Bonny Slim, LMFT & Terry Real, LICSW

Course Description

Over five live classes you’ll be introduced to the powerful principles behind Relational Life Therapy (RLT) — an in-depth introduction to the theory and practice of the RLT model. Discover the differences between RLT and traditional psychodynamic therapy; the stances of “one-down shame” and “one-up grandiosity” in couples; and the concepts of Relational Mindfulness, Joining Through the Truth, and psychological patriarchy. RLT Level 1 is the first step toward RLT certification and prepares you for the Level 2 & 3 trainings.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  • Compare the RLT phases and how RLT differs from traditional therapy.
  • Describe the role and approach of the therapist in RLT.
  • Diagnose the RLT view of power imbalances in couples, of psychological patriarchy, and how these are addressed through therapy.
  • Summarize Relational Mindfulness and the “fight, flight, fix” responses.
  • Identify the different types of leverage.
  • Discuss the concept of appropriate discrepancy and how it works with neuroplasticity.
  • List the seven lenses.
  • Interpret how preconditions are addressed in RLT.
  • Compare the two types of boundaries.
  • Demonstrate strategies for empowering latent clients.

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

Illustrate that true intimacy can only happen when partners are “same-as” — neither one-up nor one-down.

Discuss how RLT therapists and coaches will confront and teach their clients how to live truly relationally.

Hypothesize how RLT therapists and coaches use judicious self-disclosure, sharing how they use these same skills in their own relationships.

Registration URL

relationallife.com/level-1-live-july-26/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 10 NBCC credit hours (free with completion)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Requirements for CE Certificate (free of charge):
At the end of the course you’ll receive an email inviting you to request your free CE certificate. To qualify you must attend the entire course (attendance is recorded; no partial credit) and pass an assessment quiz demonstrating your understanding of the material.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$395

3 Payments

3 x $137

$411 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 48 hours after the first live class. (Deadline for refunds: May 21, 2026.)

Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase. 

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us. He founded the Relational Life Institute and has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Bonny Slim, LMFT began training in RLT in 2012 and has participated in most of Terry’s courses since. She teaches several Practicum Trainings each year; her favorite aspect of RLT is that practicing relational skills in our own lives is essential to authentically sharing them with others.

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com