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Infidelity as an Opportunity for Transformation: The RLT Perspective on Working With Affairs

A Free Online Masterclass By Couples Therapist Terry Real: Learn how to use the crisis of infidelity as a springboard for deep change in each partner and the relationship as a whole.

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What You'll Learn

PLUS  There will be time at the end to ask Terry your questions directly.

Infidelity as a Catalyst for Deep Character & Relationship Transformation

Infidelity is one of the most challenging issues couples therapists face and, as one of the top reasons for divorce in America, it’s an issue we’re likely to see in our therapy rooms. So it’s essential that we feel confident in our ability to navigate the complexities of coming back from an affair.

Infidelity is a trauma. It’s a deeply personal betrayal, it shatters the hurt partner’s perception of the relationship and their partner. Trust is completely broken. It throws the relationship into crisis.

But in crisis lies opportunity. 

In Relational Life Therapy (RLT), infidelity is used as an opportunity to address the deeper issues at play in individual partners and the relationship as a whole. RLT seeks to not only heal the trauma but help partners build a stronger, truly intimate relationship as a result. 

Watch the free training to learn how to use the crisis of infidelity as a springboard for transformation to help couples come back from an affair stronger than they were before.

What People say:

“When I need advice, I call Terry Real. His decades of clinical experience, research, and wisdom are invaluable to my patients, colleagues, and friends.”

— Esther Perel, New York Times bestselling author and podcast host of Where Should We Begin

“Terry helps reawaken couples who seem trapped in a long-term stalemate and allows them to move toward growth and fuller Selfhood.”

– Dr. Richard Schwartz, originator of Internal Family Systems

Who is Terry Real?

Terry Real, LICSW,  is an internationally recognized couples and family therapist, speaker, and New York Times bestselling author. Terry founded the Relational Life Institute (RLI) to provide workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians wanting to learn his Relational Life Therapy (RLT) methodology.

Terry has worked with thousands of individuals, couples, and fellow therapists. With 30+ years of clinical experience, Terry knows how to lead couples on a step-by-step journey to greater intimacy and personal fulfillment. Known as “the turnaround guy,” he has a history of transforming relationships that are “on the brink.”

Watch the FREE Live training and discover how to use infidelity as an opportunity for deeper transformation.

Watch the FREE Live training and discover how to use infidelity as an opportunity for deeper transformation.

Wednesday, February 15, 11am–12pm ET
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CE REQUIREMENTS:

The Relational Life Institute is pleased to offer:

Working With Men

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs.

ACEP No. 7495

FORMAT: A LIVE Online Course facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW; and Julie Rudiger, LCSW

Continuing Education credits offered: 12  credit hours

Course Description:

Over eight live online classes, learn the skills to engage, motivate, and create breakthrough change with resistant male clients in this live, practice-focused training led by renowned couples therapist and male-psychology expert Terry Real, alongside RLT Faculty Member Julie Rudiger, LCSW. Grounded in Relational Life Therapy (RLT), the course unpacks how patriarchal conditioning and performance-based self-worth fuel disconnection, defensiveness, and shutdown, then shows you how to build trust with even the most challenging men through clear, compassionate confrontation that preserves the therapeutic alliance. You’ll learn to create effective leverage for transformation without triggering collapse, withdrawal, or escalated resistance; tailor interventions for the three common presentations—“boys, bullies, and avoiders”; and reframe masculinity so emotional expression is aligned with strength, honor, and integrity rather than weakness. Through demonstrations and actionable tools from both instructors, you’ll guide men in trauma healing and relational skill development that supports healthier partnerships and parenting. Leave with a concrete RLT roadmap you can use immediately to help clients move from resistance to responsibility and from disconnection to genuine intimacy.

Learning Objectives: At the completion of this course, participants can expect to be able to:

  • Summarize the cultural shaping of masculinity and its consequences.
  • Recognize shame and grandiosity as dual defenses tied to male self-worth.
  • Develop skills to help men shift from defensiveness to compassion.
  • Identify how shame and performance-based esteem show up in male clients.
  • Discuss culturally sensitive ways to challenge entitlement and grandiosity.
  • Identify and work with three major types of difficult men: boys, bullies, and avoiders.
  • Describe how to use leverage as a tool to create change.
  • Identify patterns of resistance in men and learn how to engage them effectively.
  • Utilize leverage to create internal or external motivation for change.
  • Illustrate empowerment to the partner or family system to create pressure that opens the door to transformation.
  • Compare and differentiate between their wounded child, adaptive child, and functional adult selves.
  • Develop an internal caregiving relationship with their inner children rather than expecting partners to repair old wounds.
  • Demonstrate full relational responsibility as an adult, especially in high-conflict, high-defensiveness relationships.

Target Audience: Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors 

Course Content Level: The course content is appropriate for Beginner level clinicians.

Cost:   $497 or three payments of $197 each.

Course Date & Hours:   

1pm-2:30pm Eastern Time on:

September 10, 17, 24; October 1, 8, 2025 

TO REGISTER: https://relationallife.com/working-with-men

Cancellation Policy: You may cancel your registration up until September 16, 2025

Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel.

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Please contact our Support team if you have any questions support@terryreal.com 

Instructor’s Bio:

Terry Real, LICSW: Terry Real is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression, the straight-talking How Can I Get Through to You? Reconnecting Men and Women, The New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Make Love Work and most recently Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship just debuted in June 2022.  Terry founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians.   Terry’s work, with its rigorous commonsense approach, speaks to both men and women. A proponent of “full-throttle marriage,” Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Julie Rudiger, LCSW has been a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for the last 30 years. In 2002, Julie opened her private practice, where she has helped hundreds of individuals and couples over the last two decades. Her professional journey took a transformative turn in 2008 when she began training with Terry Real, the founder of Relational Life Therapy (RLT). Julie has since used RLT to guide clients in discovering self-esteem, healing early wounds, and fostering deeper, more authentic relationships. A faculty member at the Relational Life Institute since 2022, Julie now trains other therapists and leads community workshops, including Men’s Groups and Relationship Skills Bootcamps. Additionally, she is trained in EMDR, ACT, DBT, Gestalt, and the Enneagram.

CONFLICT of Interest: There is no known conflict of interest or commercial support for this event.

Grievance Procedure:

If a student believes they have been discriminated against, they can submit a written complaint that includes their name, address, phone number, location, date, and a detailed description of the issue. If a student with a disability disagrees with the accommodation provided or has any other grievances, they can schedule a meeting to discuss and attempt to find a solution together. If the student is still not satisfied with the accommodation after further discussion, they can contact the Operations Director for

the Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan, via phone, email, or mail. If the grievance cannot be resolved, the complainant will be advised to contact the appropriate Ethics Committee or Licensing Board. The Operations Director will keep all grievances and their resolutions confidential in locked files.

A copy of this Grievance Procedure is available upon request.

Contact information: ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 617-861-3030 lisa@relationallife.com