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Building Better Boundaries: How To Stay Connected and Protected in Your Relationships

Building Better Boundaries: How To Stay Connected and Protected in Your Relationships

Master the art of cultivating good internal boundaries to build true intimacy in your relationships in this course from Terry Real.

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A new course from New York Times BESTSELLING AUTHOR Terry Real – Building Better Boundaries: How To Stay Connected and Protected in Your Relationships

Here’s An Overview of Everything You Get In Building Better Boundaries

5 90-minute Classes with Terry Real

3 Bonus Classes with Kate Harris from the RLI Faculty

Lifetime Access to The Class Recordings and Course Material

Refer back to the material as many times as you need to help you make real self-esteem a lifelong practice.

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What You’ll Learn

Class 1: Why Healthy Relationships Need Healthy Boundaries

Explore why healthy intimate relationships require good boundaries. You’ll learn the difference between what we commonly believe to be boundaries (limits) and psychological boundaries. Terry will also lead a powerful visualization to help you build better boundaries.

We’ll cover:

  • The important distinction between “limits” and “boundaries”?
  • Exploring the differences between external boundaries and internal boundaries:
    –  The two aspects of an internal boundary.
  • Boundaryless or Walled Off: What it means to have too many/too few boundaries.
  • What does a healthy boundary look like?
  • A visualization exercise to help you establish healthy boundaries.

Class 2: Boundarylessness: Connected but Not Protected

This class is a deep exploration of what it means to lack boundaries (boundaryless). You’ll delve into the impact of your early childhood experiences and how they’re affecting your boundaries in your present. This class is also useful to helping you better understand those in your life who have too few boundaries.


 

We’ll cover:

  • A deep exploration of what it means to have too few boundaries (Boundaryless).
  • The Unholy Triad of Boundarylessness.
  • Understanding how childhood abandonment contributes to a lack of boundaries.
  • The two-step process of boundaryless love addiction.
  • The Relationship Grid: Understanding the different types of boundarylessness:
    –  Boundaryless and one-down.
    –  Boundaryless and one-up.

Class 3: The 5 Domains of Intimacy: How Well Are You Sharing & Receiving?

In this class, we’ll further explore what it means to have too few boundaries, before beginning to look at the other side of the coin: too many boundaries. You’ll discover the link between intimacy and boundaries as you assess how well you give and receive in your relationships with a practical “Intimacy Inventory” exercise.

 

We’ll cover:

  • A continued exploration of the boundaryless profiles.
  • How your level of boundaries determines how much you take in/share.
  • The 5 Domains of Intimacy and what it means:
    –  Intimacy inventory exercise.
    –  Why emotional sharing is one of the biggest issues in intimate relationships.
  • The Relationship Grid: Understanding the different types of walled-off:
    –  Walled off and one-down.
    –  Walled off and one-up.

Class 4: Living Behind Walls: Protected but Not Connected

You’ll continue exploring what it means to be walled off, with strong protective boundaries. Discover where this boundary profile comes from, the different types of love avoidance, and how to work towards healthier boundaries.

 

We’ll cover:

  • A continued exploration of the walled off boundary profiles.
  • Understanding love avoidance:
    –  The two types of avoidance and how they’re formed.
    –  The different treatments for each.

Class 5: Your Boundary Dynamics in Relationships

In this final class, you’ll bring everything together. You’ll begin to understand how your level of boundaries determines how you react with each of the other three. Description is prescription, and by knowing where your boundaries fall, you’ll uncover the specific work you need to do to build better boundaries.


 

We’ll cover:

  • How your boundary profile interacts with each of the other three.
  • Where you are on the Relationship Grid determines what your work will be.
  • How to cultivate a healthy boundary, both connected and protected at the same time.

PLUS

Plus these special bonus pre-recorded classes with Kate Harris, PhD., from the RLT Faculty…

In these class recordings, participants had the opportunity to ask more questions that will deepen your learning now. On the second call, Julie Ridiger LCSW, was there and provided additional teaching on the following:

The Art of Setting Good Limits

Understanding Your Brain for Better Boundaries

What Are Boundary Violations?

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Join Building Better Boundaries

Choose the payment option that best suits you.

3 x Monthly Payments

$145

Pay in Full

$397

You’re Protected by our Money-Back Guarantee

We’re confident you’ll love Building Better Boundaries, but we offer a 100% money-back guarantee for your peace of mind. If, for whatever reason you’re not completely satisfied, please contact us at support@terryreal.com within 14 days after purchase and we’ll issue you a full refund, no questions asked.

Do You Need More Closeness in Your Relationship… or Could a Little Distance Be What You Need?

Many of us say we want more intimacy in our relationships, but do we really know what we’re asking for? 

 

The truth is, intimacy isn’t closeness. Real intimacy requires a delicate balance of closeness and distance. 

 

Because when you and your partner are too close, you’re enmeshed. Too distant, however, and you’re like ships passing in the night. 

 

So, what’s the key to building real intimacy?
Good boundaries.

 

A good boundary is supple: it keeps you connected and protected at the same time. But often, we sacrifice connection for protection or vice versa. This leads to too many or too few boundaries, and both wreak havoc in our relationships.

Do any of these scenarios resonate with you..?

  • When your partner’s upset with you, do you find yourself anxiously scrambling to “fix” things, feeling a sense of panic that you might lose them?
  • Or do you shut down when conflicts arise, feeling overwhelmed by the intense emotions?
  • Perhaps you fall in love quickly and have a tendency to place your partner on a pedestal…
  • Or maybe you crave intimacy but find you run when your partner gets too close…

These are all signs of unhealthy boundaries.

Too few, and you become overly dependent on others for your sense of worth and value. You’re connected but struggle to self-regulate—how others feel about you is how you feel about you. 

Too many boundaries, on the other hand, and you shut the world out. You’re a fortress. You may feel protected, but that comes at the expense of genuine connection. No one can get close to you. 

Fortunately, your boundaries aren’t set in stone; they’re the result of learned behaviors. 

And you can learn to build better boundaries.

Let Terry Real teach you how

In Better Boundaries, you’ll explore how your boundaries are affecting your relationships.

You’ll discover what childhood experiences lie behind them and acquire powerful tools and skills to help you heal past wounds and build healthier boundaries, fostering a greater sense of inner peace and more fulfilling relationships. 

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What Others Say About Terry’s Courses

“It felt very profound and healing for me. I loved Terry's energy and how tenderly he spoke to the students when they came on to share. He made the concepts so clear and easy to understand and they really resonated with me. I appreciated his competence and his warmth. I really enjoyed witnessing him working with someone (and not just answering questions) - it felt very profound and healing for me. The five classes with him were life changing for me. I have much gratitude for him, for his team, and this work.”
Michelle

About Your Teachers

Terry Real

Creator of Relational Life Therapy

Terry Real, LICSW, is an internationally recognized family therapist, bestselling author, and sought-after speaker.

A former senior faculty member of the Family Institute of Cambridge in Massachusetts and a retired Clinical Fellow of the Meadows Institute in Arizona, Terry is renowned for his ability to save couples on the brink of divorce using the progressive approach he created, Relational Life Therapy. RLT equips people with the powerful relational skills they need to cultivate meaningful connections—to themselves, each other, and the planet as a whole.

Via his esteemed training school, the Relational Life Institute, Terry has trained thousands of mental health practitioners in his RLT method to date.

His original insights on couples therapy, relationships, and men’s issues have been featured in outlets from Oprah and Vogue to The Today Show and CNN. His latest book is the New York Times bestseller, US: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship.

Kate Harris

Kate Harris, PhD in Private Practice, Dover, NH and PSYPACT

Kate Harris is a Clinical Psychologist and a certified Martha Beck, North Star Coach.

Kate’s RLT journey began In 2015, after watching Terry Real work with five couples. From then, she was committed to becoming an RLT therapist, in part, because RLT honors “the worth and dignity of all people” and aligns clearly with Kate’s values.

Attending Terry’s Bootcamp in 2017 with her husband gave them tools they continue to use to stay close to each other and deepened their 32-year relationship. Kate became an RLT-certified therapist in 2018 and is excited to be part of the RLI faculty and share what she’s learned.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is this course live?

No — the classes are pre-recorded and you will gain access for life.

You also have access to three bonus classes with Kate Harris from the RLT faculty:

 

Forever! You’ll have lifetime access to the class recordings inside the private learning platform, to watch back as many times as you like. 

If you commit to showing up, doing the work, and practicing the skills Terry and his team will teach you, you can cultivate better boundaries which will provide the foundation for stronger relationships. Your boundaries will not change overnight, but with dedicated practice, the insights and skills within this course can help you find the balance between closeness and separateness that’s essential for an extraordinary relationship. 

CEs are no longer available.

Please reach out to our support team at support@terryreal.com.

Join Now

Copyright © 2024 Relational Life Institute

Free instant access. We will never spam you, unsubscribe anytime.

The Relational Life

Working With Grandiosity

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

9.5 NBCC CE credit hours for Beginner Mental Health Professionals ($40 additional fee).
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for beginner level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

Over 5 LIVE 90-minute classes with Terry Real, you will learn how to effectively address issues of grandiosity in your clients. You’ll discover a range of strategies and techniques to confront grandiose clients with the impact of their behaviors, build an alliance, motivate them to change, and guide them into connection—with themselves and those around them.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  • Identify what’s deficient in grandiose clients and understand how you supply it as the therapist.
  • Identify strategies to confidently handle resistance, evasion, and verbal abuse.
  • Understand how to reconnect grandiose clients to themselves and those around them.

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

Understand the origins of grandiosity and why it isn’t always a defense against shame.

Identify techniques to find leverage to motivate grandiose clients to engage in the therapy.

Explain why taking sides is critical when working with grandiosity—and understand how to do it.

Registration URL

relationallife.com/working-with-grandiosity/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 9.5 NBCC credit hours ($40 fee)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
  • Participants must have paid for this course, completed a course Evaluation, and passed the test (80% or higher grade) showing the material has been learned in order to receive a certificate
  • No partial credit is available
  • Failure to complete and submit these materials will result in forfeiture of CE credit for the entire course. No exceptions can be made.
If you have questions please contact support@terryreal.com for guidance.
It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these CE credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$495

3 Payments

3 x $175

$525 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 2 days after purchase. Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase.

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

Level 2 Homestudy

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

10 NBCC CE hours for Intermediate Mental Health Professionals ($40 fee)
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

ICF (International Coaching Federation)

10 ICF CCE hours (2 Core Competency + 8 Resource Development)
ICF CCE
International Coaching Federation (ICF) has approved this program for 2 Core Competency hours and 8 Resource Development hours. (Resource Development includes training formerly called Personal Development, Business Development, or Other Skills and Tools.)

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for Intermediate level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

Building on the foundational diagnostic lenses introduced in RLT Level 1, this course invites clinicians into the transformative next phase of Relational Life Therapy: deep trauma work. Therapists expand their capacity to understand each partner’s relational stance—how it was formed, how it functions defensively, and how it can be reshaped in the service of intimacy. Participants learn to conduct powerful inner child work in the presence of the partner, work effectively with resistance and leverage, and integrate attachment styles with trauma and relational stances—leaving with practical, structured tools for facilitating trauma repair within couples therapy.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  • Explain when to use positive and negative leverage
  • Describe joining through, as opposed to clobbering someone with, the truth
  • Describe using the family of origin work to rebalance the relationship
  • Explain moving from the present into the past by using the “affect bridge” (when have you felt these feelings before?)
  • Explain Transitioning to Family of Origin by using the 3 questions: (Whom did you see do this? Who did it to you? And who did you do it to and no one stopped you?)
  • Explain how to frame current difficulties as the opportunity to transform one’s legacy and hand over a different future to one’s children
  • List 4 types of trauma and where they fall on the Trauma Grid
  • Describe how the Adaptive Child is formed
  • Discuss re-parenting the Adaptive and Wounded Child parts
  • List the five fears behind resistance and how to respond to them
  • Describe understanding and befriending the resistant part
  • Describe using positive and negative leverage with a resistant part
  • Explain how to sell the value of intimacy along with its skills to a Type 1 Love Avoidant
  • Explain how to teach negotiation and the assertion of needs along with appropriate trauma work when dealing with a Type 2 Love Avoidant
  • Explain how to work on self-esteem, boundaries, and the remembrance of abundance when working with Love Dependents

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

Deepen understanding of each partner’s relational stance and its developmental origins

Identify and address multi-generational legacies influencing current couple dynamics

Conduct structured inner child work in the presence of the partner to foster empathy and intimacy

Facilitate trauma repair within the relational system rather than in isolation

Recognize and effectively work with client resistance using leverage principles

Practice detachment from outcome while maintaining clear therapeutic leadership

Apply attachment theory within RLT to guide interventions and strengthen relational connection

Registration URL

relationallife.com/level-2-training/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 10 NBCC or ICF credit hours ($40 fee)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
  • Participants must have paid for this course and attended all five LIVE online sessions in full in order to receive a Continuing Education certificate.
  • No partial credit is available — partial attendance does not qualify for partial CE hours.
  • At the end of the final session you’ll receive an email inviting you to request your certificate. The certificate is free of charge.
  • Failure to attend all sessions will result in forfeiture of CE credit for the entire course. No exceptions can be made.
If you have questions please contact support@terryreal.com for guidance.
It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, or organization is approved for these CE credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$397

3 Payments

3 x $137

$411 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 2 days after purchase. Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase.

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

Level 1 – Homestudy

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

10 NBCC CE hours for Beginner Mental Health Professionals ($40 fee)
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

ICF (International Coaching Federation)

10 ICF CCE hours (7 Core Competency + 3 Resource Development)
ICF CCE
International Coaching Federation (ICF) has approved this program for 7 Core Competency hours and 3 Resource Development hours. (Resource Development includes training formerly called Personal Development, Business Development, or Other Skills and Tools.)

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for beginner level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

Terry Real presents RLI’s introductory training course, Relational Life Therapy Level 1. Over five recorded classes you’ll be introduced to the powerful principles behind Relational Life Therapy (RLT) as taught by Terry Real, designed to give you an in-depth introduction to the theory and practice of the RLT model. Students will discover the differences between RLT and traditional psychodynamic therapy, and explore the stances of “one-down shame” and “one-up grandiosity” in couples. RLT is about action and lasting results, and the concepts of Relational Mindfulness, Joining Through The Truth, and psychological patriarchy are presented. RLT Level 1 is the first step toward RLT certification and prepares you for the Level 2 & 3 trainings.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  • Compare the RLT phases and how RLT differs from traditional therapy.
  • Describe the role and approach of the practitioner in RLT.
  • Diagnose the RLT view of power imbalances in couples, of psychological patriarchy, and how these are addressed through therapy.
  • Summarize Relational Mindfulness and the “fight, flight, fix” responses.
  • Describe the role and approach of the therapist in RLT.
  • Explain the two types of leverage.
  • Discuss the concept of appropriate discrepancy and how it works with neuroplasticity.
  • List the 8 diagnostic lenses in RLT.
  • Interpret how preconditions are addressed in RLT.
  • Compare the two types of boundaries.
  • Demonstrate strategies for empowering latent clients.

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

Illustrate that true intimacy can only happen when partners are “same-as” – neither one-up nor one-down.

Discuss how RLT practitioners will confront and teach their clients how to live relationally.

Hypothesize how RLT practitioners use judicious self-disclosure, sharing stories of how they use these same skills in their own relationships.

Registration URL

relationallife.com/level-1-homestudy/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 10 NBCC or ICF credit hours ($40 fee)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
  • Participants must have paid for this course, completed a course Evaluation, and passed the test (80% or higher grade)
  • No partial credit is available
  • Failure to complete materials results in forfeiture of CE credit for the entire course. No exceptions.
Instructions are included in your RLT Course Library for Homestudy Level 1 at https://learn.relationallife.com/
If you have questions please contact support@terryreal.com for guidance.
It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these CE credit hours. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$397

3 Payments

3 x $137

$411 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 2 days after purchase. Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase.

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

Level 3 Homestudy

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

11 NBCC CE hours for Advanced Mental Health Professionals ($40 fee)
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

ICF (International Coaching Federation)

11 ICF CCE hours (7 Core Competency + 4 Resource Development)
ICF CCE
International Coaching Federation (ICF) has approved this program for 7 Core Competency hours and 4 Resource Development hours. (Resource Development includes training formerly called Personal Development, Business Development, or Other Skills and Tools.)

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for advanced level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

This is an advanced training for RLT clinicians who have completed our Level 1 and Level 2 trainings. Terry guides participants through a combination of lecture, video presentation, discussion, role plays, and a previously recorded LIVE demonstration of RLT couples therapy, grounding theory in practice. You will observe and then practice the more advanced techniques of RLT—drilling down into how to empower the latent and reconnect the blatant—focusing on the art of therapeutic coaching and mentoring clients into relationality.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  • Practice ways to increase skill in working with family of origin issues.
  • Construct empowering reframes.
  • Demonstrate blocking and repositioning.
  • Analyze and articulate the couple’s choreography, their dynamic (e.g. the more she pursues, the more he withdraws).
  • Integrate Attachment Theory into RLT.
  • Identify and work on your “edges” as an RLT therapist.
  • Interpret the tri-part system of the psyche: wise adult, adaptive child, wounded child.
  • Measure the neurobiological underpinnings of trauma adaptation and recovery.
  • Utilize their clients’ relationships as crucibles for their own transformation.
  • Explain to your clients how to use the relational map and tool kit, a relational technology, that has the power to deliver on our new romantic ambitions.

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

Joining through the truth

What is relationality, what is self esteem?

What is real intimacy?

Triggering, types of leverage, relational reckoning

Taking a fixed position

Identifying reacting and modeling behaviors

Using skill transference, relational jujitsu

Constructing empowering reframes

RLT Stances, amplifying progress and dealing with resistance

Blocking and repositioning

Registration URL

relationallife.com/level-3-training/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 11 NBCC or ICF credit hours ($40 fee)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
  • Participants must have paid for this course and attended all five LIVE online sessions in full in order to receive a Continuing Education certificate.
  • No partial credit is available — partial attendance does not qualify for partial CE hours.
  • At the end of the final session you’ll receive an email inviting you to request your certificate. The certificate is free of charge.
  • Failure to attend all sessions will result in forfeiture of CE credit for the entire course. No exceptions can be made.
If you have questions please contact support@terryreal.com for guidance.
It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, or organization is approved for these CE credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$397

3 Payments

3 x $187

$561 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 2 days after purchase. Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase.

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

Working With Infidelity

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

7 NBCC CE hours for Intermediate Mental Health Professionals ($40 fee)
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for Intermediate level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

A 5-module previously recorded training on how to work with couples to help them come back from infidelity. This offers the unique RLT perspective on working with infidelity, where not only do we help couples survive an affair, but we focus on using the crisis as an opportunity for deeper change in the relationship.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  1. Summarize the goals of treatment: using the crisis as a springboard for transformational change in the character of each partner and the essential character of the union itself
  2. Compare the 2 phases of treatment: containment and transformation
  3. Demonstrate how to deal with countertransference: managing your own feelings around infidelity
  4. Create a platform for the hurt partner to deal with the trauma of betrayal and deceit
  5. List what ultimately helps hurt partners regain trust
  6. Identify the dysfunctional relational stances that contributed to the infidelity and how to address them
  7. Explain the 3 reasons behind an involved partner’s lack of “no”
  8. Outline how each partner can implement the relational skills for a stronger and healthier relationship
  9. Discuss moving beyond the victim/perpetrator framework into one that builds hope

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

An Overview of the RLT Approach to Infidelity

The Hurt Partner: Infidelity as a Trauma

The Involved Partner: Understanding the Lack of “No”

Infidelity as an Opportunity for Transformation

Infidelity in the Modern Age: Biases, Assumptions, and Models of Fidelity

Registration URL

relationallife.com/infidelity/#link

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 7 NBCC credit hours ($40 fee)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
  • Participants must have paid for this course, completed a course Evaluation, and passed the test (80% or higher grade)
  • No partial credit is available
  • Failure to complete materials results in forfeiture of CE credit for the entire course. No exceptions.
Instructions are included in your RLT Course Library for this course at https://learn.relationallife.com/
If you have questions please contact support@terryreal.com for guidance.
It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these CE credit hours. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$497

3 Payments

3 x $179

$537 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 2 days after purchase. Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase.

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Terry has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

Getting to a Second Session

Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

2 NBCC CE hours — free upon successful completion of a short online assessment
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Coaches, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for Intermediate level clinicians.

Format:

Self-Paced Online Course

Course Description

This self-paced training introduces therapists and coaches to one of the eight core diagnostic lenses used in Relational Life Therapy (RLT): The More, The More. Participants learn how to quickly identify the repeating relational pattern in a couple’s first session — and give them a compelling reason to return for a second.

Registration URL

relationallife.com/second-session/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 2 NBCC credit hours (free with completion)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Satisfactory Course Completion required:
Participants must complete a course Evaluation and pass a short online assessment (80% or higher). The 2 NBCC CE credit hours are then available free upon completion. No partial credit is available.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 48 hours after the first live class. (Deadline for refunds: May 21, 2026.)

Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase. 

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering a professional training program for clinicians, and has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com 

The Relational Life

RLT Level 1 Training

LIVE Workshop Continuing Ed Details

Facilitated by Bonny Slim, LMFT & Terry Real, LICSW

This course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.

NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)

10 NBCC CE hours for Beginner Mental Health Professionals — free certificate
In this photo a seal logo with two crossed rings, with the writing "approved continuing education provider nbcc seal"

ACEP No. 7495 

Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs. 

Target Audience

Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, and LMHCs, LMFT’s, Educators, Chemical Dependency Counselors

Course Content Level

The course content is appropriate for Beginner level clinicians.

Format:

Five LIVE Online Sessions on Zoom — facilitated by Bonny Slim, LMFT & Terry Real, LICSW

Course Description

Over five live classes you’ll be introduced to the powerful principles behind Relational Life Therapy (RLT) — an in-depth introduction to the theory and practice of the RLT model. Discover the differences between RLT and traditional psychodynamic therapy; the stances of “one-down shame” and “one-up grandiosity” in couples; and the concepts of Relational Mindfulness, Joining Through the Truth, and psychological patriarchy. RLT Level 1 is the first step toward RLT certification and prepares you for the Level 2 & 3 trainings.

Learning Objectives:

At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:

  • Compare the RLT phases and how RLT differs from traditional therapy.
  • Describe the role and approach of the therapist in RLT.
  • Diagnose the RLT view of power imbalances in couples, of psychological patriarchy, and how these are addressed through therapy.
  • Summarize Relational Mindfulness and the “fight, flight, fix” responses.
  • Identify the different types of leverage.
  • Discuss the concept of appropriate discrepancy and how it works with neuroplasticity.
  • List the seven lenses.
  • Interpret how preconditions are addressed in RLT.
  • Compare the two types of boundaries.
  • Demonstrate strategies for empowering latent clients.

Throughout the course, you’ll gain deeper competency in and be able to:

Illustrate that true intimacy can only happen when partners are “same-as” — neither one-up nor one-down.

Discuss how RLT therapists and coaches will confront and teach their clients how to live truly relationally.

Hypothesize how RLT therapists and coaches use judicious self-disclosure, sharing how they use these same skills in their own relationships.

Registration URL

relationallife.com/level-1-live-july-26/

Continuing Ed Credits Available: 10 NBCC credit hours (free with completion)

CE Certificate Requirements:

Requirements for CE Certificate (free of charge):
At the end of the course you’ll receive an email inviting you to request your free CE certificate. To qualify you must attend the entire course (attendance is recorded; no partial credit) and pass an assessment quiz demonstrating your understanding of the material.

It is the participant’s responsibility to check if their Board, state, organization is approved for these Continuing Ed credit hours. There is no partial credit. No refunds will be given on CE purchases for failure to check state approval.

Cost

One-Time Payment

$395

3 Payments

3 x $137

$411 in total

Commercial Support Disclaimer

There is no conflict of interest for this program. 

Accommodations

If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us at support@terryreal.com 

Cancellation Policy

You may request a refund up to 48 hours after the first live class. (Deadline for refunds: May 21, 2026.)

Please contact support@terryreal.com if you wish to cancel your purchase. 

Instructor’s Bios:

Terry Real, LICSW is the bestselling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, The New Rules of Marriage, and Us. He founded the Relational Life Institute and has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.”

Bonny Slim, LMFT began training in RLT in 2012 and has participated in most of Terry’s courses since. She teaches several Practicum Trainings each year; her favorite aspect of RLT is that practicing relational skills in our own lives is essential to authentically sharing them with others.

Please Note:

Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.

Contact information:

ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 

617-861-3030 support@terryreal.com www.relationallife.com